Kobayashi ain't got shit on me (Food Throwdown)

So around sometime in 03-04, we were at Xaos (card shop we owned) and a miraculous event happened that had me almost puking every two minutes. So it was Monday night at Xaos (draft night) and we had just finished, so all of us were outside talking and smoking. Somehow the conversation went in a direction where we ended up talking about food and who can eat shit the fastest. Obviously the conversation went way overboard in a matter of minutes and we had cash flying and bets being placed on who can finish shit the fastest. The first person to step up was Donavin. This guy was huge, I'm talking like 6'1 ish 300+ pounds. Of course no one wanted to challenge Big D so somehow I ended up doing it. So it came down to me vs Big D in a showdown on who can eat a set amount of food the fastest. There was like 8-10 people there and everyone threw in like 5 bucks each. We than selected what kind of food to eat for the challenge. There was a assortment of chips (I think doritos), rice crispy treats, air heads, sour skittles (omg...), some sort of chocolate (I think reese's) and other stuff I can't remember.

So we lay down a couple of each item on the table, watch the clock, and yell GO!!!!!! And we are off, I'm rushing to open my first pack of chips trying to crunch it down as fast as I can. As we go on into the race, I see him getting further and further ahead. Long story short, I get crushed but I do finish my food. Don't worry, the good stuff is just about to start. So everyone knew I get crushed by Big D but they wanted to see it anyway. He got paid and that was that but Tuan stepped up to the plate and started talking shit (fucken typical) and calling me out saying I was a wuss or some shit. So eventually, Tuan convinces me (with the help of the crowd) to do ANOTHER food throw down against him RIGHT AFTER I just finished my first race. Obviously I feel like shit, I just ate like 10 bags of candy and chips in like a few minutes but there is NO way in hell I'm backing away from this now.

So we lay out the items on the table AGAIN and I think we added a little more food this time, I can't recall perfectly. The crowd throws in even more money for this second run to watch us throw down (more like race to trash can to hurl). Than Tuan or Sean had this great idea of spinning us in the computer chairs like 10 times before we start the competition.........

LETS GET READY FOR ROUND 2 (only me though not Tuan / FML)


(Why didn't I do my usual no....)


So here we go, the ultimate showdown. We both sit down in our own chairs, we have people ready to spin us at the start of the timer.
3
2
1

They spin us like 10 times on the chairs, than we run outside where they have the food ready. As much as I wanna tell you an awesome story, the event isn't 100% clear for me to write so I'll just throw in some highlights. There was a lot of good plays (and misplays) as well as other stuff we could of done to get a edge on the other person. So when we get there, we're both a little dizzy but we fight through it. I remembered Tuan had a good strategy of opening shit ahead of time while he was trying to gulf down candy. So early on its even, but he has this technique where he smashes the chips inside the bag to little pieces and opens it, and pours it all into his mouth. Excellent idea, he probably saved like 30 seconds or some shit. So I fell behind there but Tuan misplayed in the middle of the race. The air heads are killer cause they take FOREVER to fucken melt down to swallow. You can't eat them like you normally do, otherwise it would take 5 minutes to eat one air head. But that shit is so rough like 1000 rubber bands made into a candy. Tuan open up like 3 air heads, roll them up like a ball and put it all in his mouth. He constantly had to spit it out cause it was too much for him to handle. You should of seen it, he was fucken drooling all over his mouth and hands. Eventually he finishes it, but all that saliva plus candy on his hands made his hands extra slippery which caused him to have trouble opening a couple bags of candy (more time lost). Sean mentioned after the race that we should of sat on the air heads the whole time so they would be warm during the end of the race - lol. Sounds gross but strong strategy - just sayin'. So around this time, we're almost done and we brought out the huge Xaos trash can cause we almost threw up like 5 times during this race.

So we hit the final round, both of us have saved the sour skittles for last. Tuan has trouble opening it again, I think he uses his teeth to open it. So we both pour like half the bag into our mouth. WTF were we thinking. It was extremely painful, you have to try it to know. First off, we're both fucken hitting our limits, especially me cause this is my second round on a fucken back to back. All that sour taste hitting you at once is a moment I'll never forget. Of course the crowd has been into this event since the beginning and they started cracking up when they saw our faces come down like we were choking on something. Somehow, we both bear through the pain and are approaching the finish line. I said I was done, but they did a mouth check and said I still had a few pieces. It's coming down to the wire, sour skittles slowing going down our throats, drool all over our mouth, our hands covered in saliva and candy. As I feel the last bits of skittles go down, I yell DONE and open my mouth for a finish check. As I say I'm done, Tuan calls out done like literally half a second after I finish. They check both our mouths for candy, we were clean and the victor is ME!!!!!!!

Somehow I survived this ordeal of candy throw down and came out on top even though the odds of me winning was slim - Tuan never plays straight up. So for a mere 50 bucks or so, I went through 20 some minutes of hell to make 8 other guys laugh there ass off and make a memory of a life time. Thanks assholes, can't believe I did this shit. FML


(Hi Tuan! - I would give you my number but I don't hang out with losers... Sry)

D-Day

THE ULTIMATE WEEKEND IS HERE (FUCK I'M A NERD)

So I can't wait to see Kick-Ass tonight. It's considered FRESH on rotten tomatoes so hopefully it will be awesome. I don't wanna hype myself too much, cause I've ruined good movies to a just a "OK" movie cause fuckers can't keep their mouth shut about how good shit is. I can't really name too many off top of my head, but it's definitely happened before. I also hate people who spoiler shit. Dude, if you know I'm gonna watch it eventually why don't you STFU. It's a pretty simple concept and just a little restraint and courtesy and you don't fucken ruin movies, manga, anime, drama, tv show, etc. for people but nooooooo. I don't wanna call out people here (ALEX) but you feel me on this though right??

Yea, I'm fucken pumped up this weekend cause the pre-release is here. Yea, sounds lame but if only you knew the addiction called MTG you wouldn't laugh at me (too much). I don't how many people are going but I just know Bryan ain't cause he's too scared to lose and realize he can't win product at these events anymore. He's lost all skill and sucks but it's ok, we still like him (no we don't). Don't worry, I'll lay the smack down on some noobs and win some packs. So after we win a lot of packs (I hope) we're probably gonna go eat and draft into the night.

Than I gotta wake up somehow on Sunday, so I get my post moves on with my Hakeem like abilities. On a side note though, Bryan's been helping with some basic stuff I need to learn. Last week, every time I set a pick, I try to roll 90% of time cause I wasn't doing that enough. So hopefully this week I work on my vision and kicking it out cause I lose the ball sometimes when I get double'd down low. Tuan was also helping me out on the court like always introducing me to the pound step that I gotta work on. I just need to expand my game more. I need to eventually learn a jump shot too so I can pick and pop or something. I'll try to take photos of our basketball group one day so you can see our awesome shot forms and Sam's awesome rebound skillz.

Before I go, Tuan said I have to post random korean girls every blog so here.....



(The "OH SHIT" pose - when the girl realizes next morning who/what she just slept with and needs to GTFO)




(The Korean Chick Glare - this action allows them to completely hypnotize men and attain free items such as Chanel Handbags)



(Panda Express ANYONE??)


Yea, I made this post in the middle of the night cause I slept at 10 and woke up at 2:30.... -_-

That time of year...

So there a couple things going on that seems to have me moving. First off, my fantasy basketball league has come to a end. I made playoffs in both leagues but the furthest I got was semis before I was crushed (to Sean). His team was better than mine, but one sub par week and bam you are out of contention. Don't worry it's April, and since fantasy is coming to a end, it is going to be the start of the NBA PLAYOFFS (ON TNT). I can now finally enjoy games without bitching at my tv about all those clanked shots and turnovers my players make. Hopefully the Lakers wake up and bring there "A" game to the playoffs cause they're playing like shit. Well, Kobe isn't playing tonight vs Denver cause they want to rest his ass until the post season, just like the Cavs are resting LeBronze(GG MATT - NO TRIPLE DOUBLE STATS FOR YOUR FANTASY).


(*CROSSES FINGERS* REPEAT COME ON!)


On a final note about playoffs, the race for the 8th seed on the East (Bulls/Raptors) is hella close, and with Bosh out, GG raptors (not like they had any chance vs the King). The Bucks are also pretty much done cause Bogut is out.


The 3rd installment in the Zendikar Block is finally upon us and the pre-release is just a week or so away.

Spoiler Here

Hard for me to gauge a set till I drafted it a few times, but it looks a lot different than the first two installments of Zendikar. Some new mechanics, huge colorless fatties, along with some new planeswalkers. I'm sure some of the guys are down to go to the pre-release and hopefully Bryan wins some packs for once (he fucken never wins packs).

There is also a movie I wanna see around that time so hopefully the whole weekend turns out to be KICK ASS

Emotions....

I'm sure you've seen enough movies to know that "emotions are what makes us human". But I'm not here to rant about feelings and all that emo shit. Go cry on someone else for that shit. I'm here to talk about controlling your emotions in game (basically not going on tilt). Bad beats happen and it's very frustrating. It happens all the time in poker, people chase that shit till the river and BAM you get 2 out'd or something. People top deck all the time in Magic too (Mike + Vines = Bryan dead). Despite all the "sacking" your opponents do, you gotta keep it cool if you wanna keep your composure.

I don't have very much poker experience so I can't really help that much but from what I do know is that if you get bad beat'd a couple of times, you can easily go on tilt. Start dumping chips into the pot like crazy with some very smart/angry raises and watch your chips dwindle. Sometimes the anger and rage just consumes you (LIKE KRATOS). A lot of people take breaks when they notice there going on tilt while some people keeping playing more and more (and probably lose a lot of money).

You can just as easily go on tilt in magic with some unlucky draws or top decks. Unlucky shit is bound to happen and you just have to cope with it. Some people love to let it out and just start cussing. While others might get physical by throwing shit or slamming the table (Sean and Bryan do this / Bryan did it real bad on Cho after he got owned by a certain trap of a lavaball vareity) along with every other thing imaginable. Doing some of those activities make it worse most of the time and let you go even further down the path to tilt. I'm sure people have different ways of dealing with the rage but I usually just go outside and have a cig to relax like I do with most shit when I get pissed. I'm not saying you should do what I do, but I'm sure you can figure one out that might help. Talking with someone and telling what happens helps. Although hearing someone say "that sux" is not gonna change the fact that you just lost the match (1 in 24 Bryan).

Not everyone loses their cool at the same speeds. Some people, it just takes one little thing and they flip out while others are way more resilient and can take the heat before they get upset. Regardless of what type you are, just remember to keep calm so you can play at your best cause everyone hates losing (I do). So remember, try to keep the rage(against the machine) controlled alright.



Before I go.... I started watching this show called V and I sort of like it. It's a remake of a old tv show from 1983 or something and has potential to be a great show. It's kind of too early for me to judge cause there's only 5 episodes but I recommend it for anyone who's bored. Plus who doesn't like hot alien chicks.

More Shows...

I watch a lot of shows. This isn't just limited to American shows, I watch Anime, Korean dramas and a bunch of other loose shit. I'm not gonna list everything I watch but if its a popular title, there is probably a high chance I've seen it. But today I'm going to talk about some new shit I been watching lately so here we go.

Breaking Bad - It's basically a show about cooking meth and selling it along with a bunch of other problems that happens along the way. I'm currently on season 2 (season 1 was really short) and so far I love it. It's got some fucked up shit that is wrong and funny at the same time. I mean come on, COOKING METH, what can be better. So if your looking for a new show to dip into, I definitely recommend this to anyone.

So I started this loose Korean Drama (what K-drama isn't loose) called God of Study. I'm almost done with the series and so far I think it's pretty decent. It's about a guy who is trying to send 5 students (with poor grades) to a top rated university in Korea by making them study day and night. It's not that serious of a drama and mainly appeals to the younger crowd. Probably very appealing to high school kids in Korea who are in the same boat of trying to ace the college exams. It tries to put a lot of humor and motivation in the series so that you can relate to all the students studying and struggling at the same time. I also enjoy this series cause it's not all that emo shit with cancer. But don't worry, this series isn't as good as BOYS (nothing is).

T-Ara's Ji Yeon as Na Hyun Jung in God of Study

(She's 16 you PERVS)

When D-Bag becomes funny (Encyclopedia Dramatica)

So I recently found this site called ED (Encyclopedia Dramatica) and oh man, it is one of the funniest shit I have ever read. This site is very similar to wikipedia and you can search up any topic you would like to learn more in. You might even find information very useful for your class or research paper, as well as uses for real life conversations (not really). Keep in mind that most of the content here is vulgar, or racist, douche, all of the above. I found this site when Matt (Ana-Bear) linked me to the page on Korea and I had a good laugh for about 10 minutes. I'm gonna just talk about some shit I read so far on the site.

First off - Naruto LARP FAIL

I know its fucked up, but its funny as hell. Call me douche or whatever but man, Codey "CODE RED" Porter was fucken role playing Gaara of the Sand and accidentally died while his head was in the sandbox. You can read the full story in the link.


(RIP CODE RED - DON'T WORRY NARUTO WILL SAVE YOU FROM AKATSUKI)

Oh btw, I know its fucked up, but please don't forget to read the Bel - Air rap song in the link (bottom of page). Trust me, its worth reading.

**However, some do speculate that this was not an accident of a fucking retarded kid, but instead a plot by Codey's "friends". It was rumored that Codey was used as a sacrifice by his friends in order for them to obtain the Mangekyo Sharingan.**

KOREA KOREA KOREA

Yup, fucken koreans. Oh man, the "How to troll a Korean" section and "fun facts" are so funny. I guess its true - "all Koreans have hardons for Starcraft".


(Zerglings FTW)


(History Lesson)

Although that Korean Woman are ugly - idk.....



Looks fine to me or maybe you prefer to see them dancing.

I don't really know what to write anymore cause I'm laughing too much - so go check out

CHINA
LMAO - Chinese Hobbies "Doing Math"

and

JAPAN
Yes, I did learn your culture through Anime.



Oh yea before I go.....

So I'm calling out my homeboy Dean, how is New Zealand?

Low-Blows (Capitalizing on your Opponents Mistakes)

Just like how I talked about people making mistakes in games, this is about taking advantage of it when your opponents mess up. It may seem dirty on the outside to take advantage of someone who makes a mistake, but it's one that is necessary in order to become victorious at the end of the day. Taking advantage of any favorable scenario is what all top gamers do, and something you must do also in order to push the game in favor of you. Now I'll just go over a few things I noticed in games I play.

MTG - Some mistakes are harder to see in magic because you don't know how bad that play hurt your opponent until you know his hand. Other are blatantly obvious such as a bad attack that leaves him vulnerable by a counter attack on your turn cause he has no/too few blockers. The list can go on and on, but the important thing is to concentrate. Paying attention to the finer details is usually a good way to spot possible ways to make the board or situation more favorable thanks to your opponents mistakes. Hopefully your opponent like to "punt" (give the game away with a bad mistake) a lot so that you can have a easier time stealing games, and trust me, this happens more than you think. But remember, no matter how bad they mess up, sometimes they get away thanks to a timely top deck.

L4D - Left 4 Dead was one of the few games I've seen where they severely punish you for mistakes (Survivor Side). The game is designed as a team effort and one survivor running around alone, rushing ahead, getting caught in bad spots, etc. can lead to the death of your whole team. A lot of times, the team winning the match comes down to your opponents making a mistake on survivor, the infected team capitalizing on it, and winning by point bonus thanks to depleting your health or killing your whole team.

Sports - Sports is a easy one as you see what happens when you mess up on TV a lot. Turnovers, interceptions, etc.

WoW - Arena is another team format where you can capitalize on your opponents mistakes. Some times your opponents will be caught in the open because of bad positioning on their part which will lead to free kills. A lot of different scenarios can happen because there is so many different classes and spells, but bad position is one I find common.



(If you suck at arena, you can always look for PUG raids - ROGUE 170HP DPS LFG)